Today, six years and ten days after C. Lawrence Hamme, my grandfather, passed away, the beautiful Pauline F. Hamme has gone home. I am alone. I cannot go home until after church tomorrow and I'm not certain I should until closer to her memorial service... which is tentatively scheduled for Saturday.
I woke to the phone call.
I'm both grateful and numb.
I took a shower and then used that ridiculous hair towel that Grandma gave each of us when she first began losing her hair nearly fifteen years ago.
I made coffee in my Keurig because that is what I would be drinking if I were sitting at my Grandma's kitchen table today... and how I long to sit at that table with her one more time.
I'll make warm vanilla milk as I settle in tonight before bed.
I am unsure of what the days ahead of me will hold this week. I know that my Grandma is at rest in peace with her Savior. I know that I am, indeed, not alone... and that the beagle has not left my side all day. I suppose, sometimes whether we are ready or not, we get thrust into our new realities. This new reality means that 203 days from now, as I prepare to walk down the aisle, I will be loving Paulie Hamme from afar.
Love and miss you, Gramma. Rest eternal grant her, Oh Lord.